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MorningStar
Maitre d'
Joined: 15 May 2006
Posts: 387
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 Posted: Mon Dec 18, 2006 7:51 am Post subject: At the doctors... |
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A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe disease, combined with horrible stress. If you don't do the following, your husband will surely die."
"Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Try to be pleasant in general, and make sure he stays in a good mood. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare something nice and healthy again. Don't burden him with chores, as he probably had a hard day. Don't discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse."
"If you can do this for the next 1 to 2 months, I think your husband will regain his health completely".
On the way home, the husband asked his wife, "What did the doctor say?". She replied, "The doctor said, you're going to die".
Last edited by MorningStar on Mon Dec 18, 2006 8:52 am; edited 2 times in total |
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Sugar Plum
Maitre d'
Joined: 26 Jul 2006
Posts: 159
Location: Dunedin, New Zealand
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| Posted: Mon Dec 18, 2006 8:30 am Post subject: |
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ROTFL.....I love that one Markus...very good.  |
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PanterA
Maitre d'
Joined: 22 Jul 2006
Posts: 100
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| Posted: Mon Dec 18, 2006 3:37 pm Post subject: :D |
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| LOL |
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angry beaver
Busboy
Joined: 24 Jul 2006
Posts: 14
Location: up a tree... in old london town
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| Posted: Mon Dec 18, 2006 9:47 pm Post subject: |
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a frog goes in to a bank, when he gets to the counter he sees the tellers name is, paddy whack.
the frog says, hello paddy whack, id like to borrow 3000 dollars, but its ok im kermit jagger the manager knows my dad.
paddy whack replied we need a garontour or some collatoral to hold on to.....
kermit gave her a small plastic pink elephant,
perplexed with this she said hold on im going to see the manager....
she said to the manager theres a frog out there wantin some money and gave me this...
yes replied the manager......
its a nick nack, paddy whack, give the frog a loan his old mans a rolling stone. |
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Sugar Plum
Maitre d'
Joined: 26 Jul 2006
Posts: 159
Location: Dunedin, New Zealand
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| Posted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 12:49 am Post subject: |
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 Ok that one is quite funny too |
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Sugar Plum
Maitre d'
Joined: 26 Jul 2006
Posts: 159
Location: Dunedin, New Zealand
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| Posted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 12:53 am Post subject: |
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Ok this is one for all the girls:
Men are like a fine wine,
They start off as young sweet grapes and then have to be mashed to a pulp to make a good vintage. |
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Shehzeen
Maitre d'
Joined: 22 Jul 2006
Posts: 339
Location: Bangladesh
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| Posted: Wed Dec 20, 2006 11:18 am Post subject: |
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HEHE sugar good 1.  |
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misschatterbox
Maitre d'
Joined: 21 Sep 2006
Posts: 220
Location: NONE
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| Posted: Mon Dec 25, 2006 7:43 pm Post subject: :-D |
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Sugar,
I must try that on my boyfriend. LOL |
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CrackALack_420
Busboy
Joined: 10 Aug 2006
Posts: 19
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| Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 12:43 pm Post subject: |
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what do you call an X in the shower?
a Clean-X hahahahaha...not funny |
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CrackALack_420
Busboy
Joined: 10 Aug 2006
Posts: 19
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| Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 12:45 pm Post subject: |
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Giraffe walks into a bar..
bartender says "why the long face?" |
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CrackALack_420
Busboy
Joined: 10 Aug 2006
Posts: 19
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| Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 12:48 pm Post subject: |
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What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs
on your doorstep?
Mat.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean?
Bob. |
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CrackALack_420
Busboy
Joined: 10 Aug 2006
Posts: 19
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| Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 12:58 pm Post subject: |
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Guy walks into a bar and orders 6 double shots of vodka. Bartender asks "rough day?"
guy replies "just found out my older brother is gay"
he takes the shots then leaves...
Guy comes back the next day and orders the same thing. Bartender says "what is it this time?"
guy replies "just found out my younger brother is gay" he takes the shots then leaves..
Guy comes back the next day and orders the same thing. Bartender says "doesnt anyone in your family like women?" guy replies "yeah, my wife" |
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Shehzeen
Maitre d'
Joined: 22 Jul 2006
Posts: 339
Location: Bangladesh
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| Posted: Fri Jan 05, 2007 3:14 pm Post subject: |
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| haha Gr8 jokes every1. |
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misschatterbox
Maitre d'
Joined: 21 Sep 2006
Posts: 220
Location: NONE
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| Posted: Sat Jan 06, 2007 5:01 am Post subject: :-D |
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| CrackALack_420 wrote: | Giraffe walks into a bar..
bartender says "why the long face?" |
I've heard this one but with a HORSE instead of the giraffe! |
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Wonderful Goose
Maitre d'
Joined: 26 Jul 2006
Posts: 143
Location: you'll have to guess!
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| Posted: Sat Jan 06, 2007 12:42 pm Post subject: Re: :-D |
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| misschatterbox wrote: | | CrackALack_420 wrote: | Giraffe walks into a bar..
bartender says "why the long face?" |
I've heard this one but with a HORSE instead of the giraffe! |
If anyone's watched racing stripes then they'll have heard it with a zebra instead of a giraffe of horse too! |
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